Glass Ball, Rubber Ball

I dropped the ball again. Except—as I heard someone once share how they manage the demands of Life—to me this was a rubber ball, not a glass one. I know this will bounce back, but I still should have shared yesterday.

Anyway…I’d like you to meet two new friends of mine: Mr. & Mrs. Shroom.

They hang out with me at work to let my coworkers know whether I’m having a good or bad mental health day. If good, Mrs. Shroom hangs out with me; if bad, well…her grumpy spouse joins me instead. You get the idea.

Yesterday was the first day Mr. Shroom and I hung out.

Before I came to work, with snot and tears streaming down my face, I lamented about having to switch my reversible plushie from pink to black. Even if Mr. & Mrs. Shroom are there to help me communicate to my coworkers my needs, I didn’t want them to know. I wanted to keep hiding how I felt. That’s what was so uncomfortable to me, especially when so many have rejected me before.

But go to work I did. Mr. Shroom and I were a team, and you know what? No one treated me differently. In fact, most gave me my space and let me hyper-focus on a project which is exactly what I needed.

Why do I share all this?

While we don’t have the same relationship with y’all, my dear readers, as I do with my coworkers, it’s similar, but more the supplier/client side of things. You expect me to produce content, a product, you can consume. Unfortunately, I’m not capable of delivering to you that content, product, at the moment. I need to hang out with Mr. Shroom a little while longer.

Thus, I’m making the executive decision to go on a brief hiatus to give myself time to breathe and let this diagnosis settle.

I thought the start of this year would be different. I thought I’d be able to juggle both my writing, bringing more content, and my new job without dropping anything. Problem is, another even more fragile ball got thrown into the mix I didn’t expect to juggle: my autism diagnosis. (Is there anything more fragile than glass?)

I’m still writing. I have posts and short stories queue up and ready for you (mostly just blog posts). But…that final push, that last stretch, to polish and make it ready to publish is where I’m struggling most.

For now, let’s tentatively say for the next month I’ll be “off” since I already have strategies in place that come March, I should be able to jump back in and share with you all the exciting things I’m still wanting to offer.

This is merely a reprieve. Until then, take care of yourselves, lovelies! Be well.